The First Glops Have Hit the Fan, Do You Have Enough Toilet Paper?

Yes, I believe the first glops have hit the fan blades. I can list all the reasons why, but I really don’t want to go there in depth. But I think many of you are with me on this.

We can debate on where we’ll end up, but in the meantime, things could start getting a little weird.  I, for one, don’t want to find myself in a Venezuela-style toilet paper line along after the beneficiaries have stripped the shelves dry tornado-style.  Yes, I’m aware of substituting  newspaper, leaves, and the dreaded “family cloth.” I’m just not that kind of person – I want my little luxuries for as long as I can manage them, and TP is one of those.

So let’s talk TP. How much should you stock to get through a long-term crisis?

Here’s a few ideas on how to start figuring that out:

1) If you work outside the home, you may think you don’t use very much.

But remember, you hit the loo several times a day at work, and that should be factored in. HOW you hit the loo at work is also important to consider (#1 vs #2). For instance, I have a male acquaintance that never buys TP. He does all his business at his place of, er, business. But when the SHTF, you won’t be at work, so keep track of your TP usage on a weekend.

2) Remember that ladies use more than men.

And it can vary during a month. I could go into why, but it’s better left unsaid. Just know that we do and we’ll leave it at that.

3) Children often use more than adults.

Even though they’re smaller, they have yet to master the whole thing.

4) Figure your usage by counting tubes after a weekend.

Start the weekend off by putting fresh rolls in every bathroom and put a basket in a common area. Ask your family to dispose of the tubes in the basket (here’s how you can use them for fire starters).

Count the tubes up at the end of the weekend, and round up if you’ve got half-used rolls hanging around.

5) Not all rolls are made the same.

When you’re keeping track of usage, keep that in mind the number of plies, sheet count, size, etc.

I can tell you that in my house, we go through about 70% of a  “double roll” a day – this is for two adults, one lady, one man, both working from home. My girlfriend with two teenage daughters, all of whom leave the house for work or school, still goes through at least a roll a day. So in my stockpile, I have about 320 rolls:  more than enough for six months for the two of us and I can share/barter if need be. I buy a case at a time from Amazon.

That way, I’ve got some luxury and some tools to barter with – and I can help my loved ones as well. Everybody is happier with a tidy south end.

How much toilet paper are you stocking these days? I’d love to know how you have determined what you need to keep in stock.